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Little Johnny Jokes Collection

Funny Jokes

Best Little Johnny Jokes for You

Teacher asks to students, “What would you like to be when you grow up?”
Little Johnny says, “I will follow in my father’s footsteps and become a cop.”
Teacher raises his eyebrows, “Johnny, I think your father is not a cop.”
Johnny explains, “Of course, he is not. “He is a thief.” 😃

Little Johnny was sent back to bed for the eighth time that night and his mother is not amused.
She says, “If I hear one more time ‘Mother, I want this, mother, I want that’,
you will be in trouble! I don’t want to hear the word mother again tonight. Now off to bed you go!”
There’s a short pause, after which Little Johnny says, “Mrs Robert, I want a glass of milk, please.” 😝

Little Johnny asks the teacher, “Miss Julia, can I be punished for something I haven’t done?”
Miss Julia says, “No, that would be very unfair!”
Little Johnny is relieved, “Miss Julia, I haven’t done my home work.” 😎

Teacher: "Alright, if any of you think you are stupid, please stand up!"
After sometimes Little Johnny stands up.
The teacher says, "Do you think you are stupid in the class?"
"No, Teacher, but I didn’t want to leave you standing all alone!" 😂

Very Funny Little Johnny Jokes

Teacher: “If you had 5 dollars and you asked your father for another dollar,
how many dollars would you have in the end?”
Without hesitation, Johnny says, “5 dollars.”
Teacher says, “Come on, Johnny, you don’t know how to count.”
Johnny replies, “Maybe, but I do know my father!” 😂

Teacher to Little Johnny: “Come now Johnny!” Admit it. Didn't your parents help with homework?
Little Johnny replied: "Absolutely no. They did it all on their own!" 😅

Little Johnny to his mom: “I shot six goals at the football match today!”
Mom: “Great, I think your team won the match, correct?”
Little Johnny: “Not really, we played 3:3” 😃

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One day Little Johnny came late in class.
Teacher asked: Why you are coming so late today?
Little Johnny replies: “I met an old man who had lost his wallet on the road.
The teacher: “you were helping to find it!”
Little Johnny said: “Um, not really,
but I had to keep standing on it until old man would give up and go away.” 😆

Little Johnny Jokes For Laugh

During an English class, teacher asks, "Can anyone give me an excellent example for the word ‘COINCIDENCE’?”
Little Johnny replies, "Teacher, my mother and my father were married on the same day." 😅

Teacher: Little Johnny, please go outside the classroom and stay there.
Little Johnny: Why?
Teacher: Because your blabbering is very disruptive and nobody wants to hear it.
Little Johnnny: Then perhaps you should come along with me. 😎😝

Little Johnny runs to his and says, “Father, father…”
Father turns angrily and says, “From now on you’ll speak only when I’ve asked you something!”
Little Johnny wait few seconds and continues,
“Father, can you please ask me if you’ve forgotten to put in the handbrake and if your truck is now rolling down the street?” 😅😆

After Sunday school, the teacher released the kids to go to church and reminded them, “You all know to be very nice and quiet in the church. And why is that?”
Little Johnny offers, "Miss, it’s so we wouldn’t wake all those people sleeping." 😃

Latest Little Johnny Jokes

School teacher asks to Little Johnny, “Little Johnny, tell me, do you say your prayers before meals?”
Little Johnny reply proudly, “No Teacher, there’s no need, my mother cooks really well.” 😃

Little Johnny’s Mother says, " If you continue being so naughty,
then you'll get children who will be very naughty!"
Little Johnny replies: "Ha Ha Ha..., are you aware of what you just said?" 😉

Teacher: “Little Johnny, how old is your father?”
Johnny: “He’s as old as me.”
The surprised teacher: “Now how would that be possible?”
Little Johnny: “Well – he became father the day I was born.” 😃

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